The line from Matt Redman’s song did not leave my head all day yesterday. Yesterday was meant to be in the top three happiest days of my year so far with the arrival of my parents but sadly yesterday turned out to be probably the hardest day I have ever gone though here. Don’t get me wrong – my parents have arrived safely and it’s so great to have them here, but yesterday also turned into the day I was praying would never come.
Yesterday I got a phone call to say the twins were being given back to their “family”. Now in most cases when children go back to their family it’s a good thing and we are happy but in this instance the whole family circumstances around the twins are very complicated. There have been a lot of lies told and a lot of wrong information given and in my opinion the whole thing is a mess. In the middle of it all there are two very young fragile lives and all they are asking for is to be loved which was never a hard thing to do. So, just as I was about to step out to the airport I got the phone call and had to go and quickly get their stuff together and send them off. This brought back many memories and raised a few questions because I knew some people who had to give a child back when they were almost ready to sign the adoption papers. What about the lovely couple who were ready to adopt the twins – how are they in all this?
“You give and take away. You give and take away, my heart will choose to say, Lord blessed be your name.” When I stop and think about this, this has to be one of the hardest things to say. When things are going bad around me, I have to choose to believe God is a good God and his plan is perfect and he has the best in store for me and others around. Some days this is really not easy and I think would test the greatest saints and in case you hadn’t noticed – I am no saint! I do know that there have been circumstances which have been painful but where in time I can look back and see God in it all - but today I just have to choice to believe God is good after the events with the twins yesterday.
Friday, 29 May 2009
Sunday, 24 May 2009
Live and Let Die
You may have forgotten what I sound like as its been a while since I have written anything! I hope you are sitting comfortably and have a cup of something good in your hand because here’s what's been going on!.
Adelide – I saw her today……………………she now has had her head badly shaved and has an IV put into a vein in her head, which is a very scary thought, but not as bad as the thought of when they put an IV in her neck! Anyway, finally they have started her on TB treatment, but because it's gone untreated/undiagnosed for such a long time the chances of survival are in question. Also being in the hospital for so long now she has picked up another infection or “something” and honestly is a very sad sight, she is pale, fighting for breath and has eyes that look into yours and say “please get me out of here”.
New Arrival – We have twins now in the nursery! Mario and Carolina. They are 4 weeks old. The family history is very scary and also very sad, but there is a strong possibility that these two will be adopted quite quickly.
Deaths – We have had two this week. Pastor Andre and Pedro one of our drivers, both quite a shock for many here.
Accidents- I have seen the aftermath of two fatal accidents this weekend. Some of the images which will remain with me for the rest of my life. This is the side of life here I hate. To people here death is such a part of life but it doesn’t need to be – there are so many needless deaths.
Punishment – when kids don’t do what they are told to here, or are rude, the “best” way to punish them is to beat them. This week I saw a kid who has been beaten by his mother, culture says this is how you discipline a child – as white people what do we know, except I have not experienced anything like that before.
Visitors- My Uncle made it to Mozambique. It was great having a familiar face and someone to show around! He was an easy guest – we went to Swaziland which was a pleasant trip.
This week sees the arrival of two more guests, I am very very excited about these ones coming and am praying for safety in their travel and the luggage arrives.
June 1st is Children’s Day here. Children’s Day is a little like Christmas Day -presents and chicken dinners and fun. Dorm Parents have been getting ready with gifts for all their kids, and I have been helping put together gift bags for the kids at the Bocaria.
This week seems to have been a week of firsts – and honestly a lot of them are first’s I would rather not have seen.
Adelide – I saw her today……………………she now has had her head badly shaved and has an IV put into a vein in her head, which is a very scary thought, but not as bad as the thought of when they put an IV in her neck! Anyway, finally they have started her on TB treatment, but because it's gone untreated/undiagnosed for such a long time the chances of survival are in question. Also being in the hospital for so long now she has picked up another infection or “something” and honestly is a very sad sight, she is pale, fighting for breath and has eyes that look into yours and say “please get me out of here”.
New Arrival – We have twins now in the nursery! Mario and Carolina. They are 4 weeks old. The family history is very scary and also very sad, but there is a strong possibility that these two will be adopted quite quickly.
Deaths – We have had two this week. Pastor Andre and Pedro one of our drivers, both quite a shock for many here.
Accidents- I have seen the aftermath of two fatal accidents this weekend. Some of the images which will remain with me for the rest of my life. This is the side of life here I hate. To people here death is such a part of life but it doesn’t need to be – there are so many needless deaths.
Punishment – when kids don’t do what they are told to here, or are rude, the “best” way to punish them is to beat them. This week I saw a kid who has been beaten by his mother, culture says this is how you discipline a child – as white people what do we know, except I have not experienced anything like that before.
Visitors- My Uncle made it to Mozambique. It was great having a familiar face and someone to show around! He was an easy guest – we went to Swaziland which was a pleasant trip.
This week sees the arrival of two more guests, I am very very excited about these ones coming and am praying for safety in their travel and the luggage arrives.
June 1st is Children’s Day here. Children’s Day is a little like Christmas Day -presents and chicken dinners and fun. Dorm Parents have been getting ready with gifts for all their kids, and I have been helping put together gift bags for the kids at the Bocaria.
This week seems to have been a week of firsts – and honestly a lot of them are first’s I would rather not have seen.
Wednesday, 6 May 2009
These are the days of our lives
It’s been one of those days, where you think it’s going to be nice and quiet, I will get some reading done, relaxing, watching some Prison Break – you know the typical things a “missionary” does. Well the above is so far from what my day has been.
Today was the first day of Bocaira being on a Wednesday morning. It went well I think. My friend was telling the story of the Prodigal Son – just as she started in the pigs that live next door started to grunt loudly – just to remind me of the image of the son eating the pigs food. It made me smile inside.
I get back to the centre to discover that we are having to admit Adelide to hospital. Since she arrived about 3 weeks ago, most days she has been having a fever of 102-103.7 and has been in a lot of distress.
So she is in hospital tonight with an IV drip of anti biotics. We are almost certain she has TB and is very sick with that but also there is talk of a lumbar puncture as we suspect she maybe also has meningitis........ these two things together are very bad.
I held her for a while today before she left and prayed but its hard seeing someone so little suffer a lot. There was a few minutes where she just keep looking into my eyes as if she knew something was up and something was going to happen to her. All I could do was pour love into her, and trust her to God. Some days here are a lot of fun and then there are the others when you have to admit a very young baby into the hospital. That kinda feels tough.
One of the older girls is also in hospital having collapsed yesterday at lunch. She is 13. She is on an adult ward because she is 13 and no one is allowed to stay with her. She is allowed a visit for one hour a day.
Please pray for both our girls.
Today was the first day of Bocaira being on a Wednesday morning. It went well I think. My friend was telling the story of the Prodigal Son – just as she started in the pigs that live next door started to grunt loudly – just to remind me of the image of the son eating the pigs food. It made me smile inside.
I get back to the centre to discover that we are having to admit Adelide to hospital. Since she arrived about 3 weeks ago, most days she has been having a fever of 102-103.7 and has been in a lot of distress.
So she is in hospital tonight with an IV drip of anti biotics. We are almost certain she has TB and is very sick with that but also there is talk of a lumbar puncture as we suspect she maybe also has meningitis........ these two things together are very bad.
I held her for a while today before she left and prayed but its hard seeing someone so little suffer a lot. There was a few minutes where she just keep looking into my eyes as if she knew something was up and something was going to happen to her. All I could do was pour love into her, and trust her to God. Some days here are a lot of fun and then there are the others when you have to admit a very young baby into the hospital. That kinda feels tough.
One of the older girls is also in hospital having collapsed yesterday at lunch. She is 13. She is on an adult ward because she is 13 and no one is allowed to stay with her. She is allowed a visit for one hour a day.
Please pray for both our girls.
Saturday, 2 May 2009
Everything changes but you
Things in Moz change all the time- just when you get used to something or someone being around they go.
At the moment here we seem to be going though a lot of change, people coming, going etc. I used to think I was someone who loves change but am discovering that letting people in to your life to have them leave again is very hard and can be quite emotionally draining, but I do know that I would much rather have them in my life for a short season than not at all.
I have enjoyed a very relaxing weekend in South Africa. My friend Erin and I went to stay at Mercy Air’s base. They are a charity who fly into remote villages in Southern Africa bringing humanitarian aid. Beautiful scenery, peace, and monkeys and other things we can do in SA that we can’t do here in Maputo – what more can a girl ask for. It was lovely driving through the mountains and seeing some autumn colours on the trees a sight not seen in Mozambique.
Being in SA is nice for a few days… of course being stopped for speeding NOT so much fun especially when you think you will have to drive half way back on the road just travelled to pay a stupid fine, then in the end I was let off and paid a bribe. As it was the last Fri of the month all the speed cops were out to try and get a little extra take home for the weekend.
Being away for a few days in what in places feels like a first world country has a strange effect. The mall is very western which I am grateful for – the shops (at a price) keep sweets from the UK. It really is possible to buy anything you wanted for a comfortable existence. What did strike me were the people on the corner of the road hitching a ride. When you see a mother with her baby strapped to her back it's hard not to pull in. The trouble is so often there is a gang waiting in the bushes to hijack the car. It is a sad world we live in. I know these things happen all over and not just in SA.
I had a sense of hitting “home” when we crossed back into Mozambique. It always takes me a little time to re adjust to speaking Portuguese again.
This month sees my uncle and parents making their way for the first time to Mozambique, I am very excited but have to confess my room is going to need some work before they get here.
At the moment here we seem to be going though a lot of change, people coming, going etc. I used to think I was someone who loves change but am discovering that letting people in to your life to have them leave again is very hard and can be quite emotionally draining, but I do know that I would much rather have them in my life for a short season than not at all.
I have enjoyed a very relaxing weekend in South Africa. My friend Erin and I went to stay at Mercy Air’s base. They are a charity who fly into remote villages in Southern Africa bringing humanitarian aid. Beautiful scenery, peace, and monkeys and other things we can do in SA that we can’t do here in Maputo – what more can a girl ask for. It was lovely driving through the mountains and seeing some autumn colours on the trees a sight not seen in Mozambique.
Being in SA is nice for a few days… of course being stopped for speeding NOT so much fun especially when you think you will have to drive half way back on the road just travelled to pay a stupid fine, then in the end I was let off and paid a bribe. As it was the last Fri of the month all the speed cops were out to try and get a little extra take home for the weekend.
Being away for a few days in what in places feels like a first world country has a strange effect. The mall is very western which I am grateful for – the shops (at a price) keep sweets from the UK. It really is possible to buy anything you wanted for a comfortable existence. What did strike me were the people on the corner of the road hitching a ride. When you see a mother with her baby strapped to her back it's hard not to pull in. The trouble is so often there is a gang waiting in the bushes to hijack the car. It is a sad world we live in. I know these things happen all over and not just in SA.
I had a sense of hitting “home” when we crossed back into Mozambique. It always takes me a little time to re adjust to speaking Portuguese again.
This month sees my uncle and parents making their way for the first time to Mozambique, I am very excited but have to confess my room is going to need some work before they get here.
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